Stop Wishing For It!

Wishing for a good thing doesn’t accomplish much does it? I’ve known some people, myself included, that have fondly used the phrase, “You can hope in one hand, and shit in the other, and see which one fills up first.” I’ve always found that line to be a bit hilarious, crude yes, but also quite funny. I think the reason behind that is because the sentiment behind the statement is so true. Thinking about something good happening is far less effective than actually doing something about it. It really comes down to action versus inaction. I’m not quite sure I’ll ever see anyone squat down and actually try to shit in their own hand, but the point should be well taken. You must Do something to get something.

Personally, I’ve been in love with being a writer for years. I’d sit and imagine what it would be like getting my stories published, wonder what it would be like to give up my nine-to-five daily grind and just sit in front of my laptop, pounding away at the keys. I’d dream of seeing my name in print and telling my friends and fans about my next novel. I’d sit down and craft short stories that I believed told a great story and delivered an emotional punch that resonated. But you know what I didn’t do? I never submitted anything for consideration. I never once sent out a story just to see if it would get published. I had all these short stories and half finished novel ideas but I never really Did anything. I was hoping in one hand, but that was about it.

One day, my brother said to me “Maybe you’re just not a writer” and it was like a slap in the face, because I wondered if he was right. Part of me knew he couldn’t be, but part of me wasn’t sure. Why had I waited all those years and still not committed to writing? What was I waiting for? I asked myself a ton of questions, came up with a bunch of answers, but in the end it really came down to one thing: I was scared. It was easier to dream and hope than to actually Do. But doing is what makes life worth living. So I consciously decided to not fail, not waste my time, and stop hoping something good would happen, and I decided to Make something happen. 

In the last six months I’ve written about 30,000 words on my novel and submitted to a half dozen publications. Okay, so I haven’t gotten anything accepted yet, but I’m Doing, not just hoping. You know what, even if I don’t get anything published and I ultimately fail, at least I tried. To me, I’d rather have the fact of failing than the regret of just hoping without action. Life is worth the risk, and the more I take, the more I experience things of value. Give it a try. It’s worth it.

Thanks for reading. Questions and comments are welcome.

Beware of Betrayal

There’s an old cliché, “your word is your bond”.  Ever hear it?  Well in the end, it’s true.  You can have all the legal documents you want stating this or that, you can have witnesses claiming this or that, and you can promise this or that until you’re blue in the face, but ‘your word’ is more than just air across your lips.  In regards to trust, ‘your word’ refers also to your intentions, beliefs, character, conviction, and worth.  Pretty heady huh?  I know to some it might seem like I’m going too far or being a bit grandiose, but am I?  People are who they are and their actions speak silent words.  Words you can trust or distrust depending on the person and circumstances. 

I think the best answer is to stay true to your own personal convictions, reinforce in your own mind what is right, true, and honorable, and go from there.  Despite how hard you may try, you can’t change anyone but yourself.  So don’t waste valuable mental energy trying to exact change from anyone but you.  The stronger sense of positive integrity you have for yourself will reveal, in one way or the other, the negativity of the other person.  Now this isn’t a perfect answer.  It doesn’t negate the daily, or weekly, or momentary struggles you may have with this problem.  Sadly, there is not silver bullet, no magic pill, no incantation that will wash away the problem.  We must all deal with it.  Being steadfast in your own integrity will help follow you through to the other side and stay true to your own mission. 

Comments and questions are always welcome.  Thanks for reading.

What’s the price of your dream?

Ocean of Dreams

Have you ever wanted something so bad that you were willing to sacrifice everything else to get it?  There are so many choices we have to make in life, sometimes it’s difficult to know what to sacrifice and what to hold on to.  Dreams can be powerful motivators in directing your life to a positive state.  However, dreams can be destructive gremlins that ruin everything else if you let them.  It’s okay to have a dream, to want it fulfilled and live the way you want to live, but it always comes at a price.  I’ve heard it said, you have to give to get.  Well I’m sure that’s true, but how much should you give, and how much should you get back?  If you haven’t realized yet, I’m talking about balance.  When your life is balanced, things make sense.  When you are off kilter, things are confusing.  So, if you have a dream and are willing to sacrifice everything else to get it, will that balance your life?  To me, the easy answer is no.

When I was in college, I wanted to graduate.  Obviously graduation represented an accomplishment and proof to the world that I achieved something extraordinary.  Graduating also meant I could get a better job.  But also, and even more important to me, were the experiences I gained while in school.  Yes it was important to get an education, it was important to have credentials and documents, but I was not willing to sacrifice everything to get it.  I read about some people who sacrifice things in advance without knowing the consequences, and it’s sad.  Was their dream to be mired in debt for life?  Of course not, but it goes to show you life can be tipped off balance easily if you don’t pay attention to details.  I worked through college just like a lot of other students.  I also knew exactly why I was there.  And, coming from a poor family, I understood the value of every dollar I earned and spent.  I had to balance my dreams with my reality. 

It’s hard to find balance sometimes.  It may be that you will have to suffer before you come to understand.  I know that’s not comforting, but it is reassuring to know if you pay attention to those details I was talking about, you will find that balance… eventually.  Following your dreams is a worthy endeavor.  Don’t stop.  Just remember that there are many paths to go down in your pursuit.  If something seems way too difficult, complex, or confusing, stop.  You don’t have to change your dream, just change the path you take to get there.  That way, you can still follow your dream without sacrificing everything else you care about to get it.  And that’s a good balance in life!

This amazing painting is by Josephine Wall; it's called Ocean of Dreams.  Check out her online gallery.

If you have any questions or comments, feel free to reply.  Thanks for reading!

What’s really important?

Douglas Clark

-Head writer, The Inspiration Engine

That may seem like a simple, even trite question to ask.  If you give it more than a passing thought, the deeper meaning of it starts to shine through.  What is really important?  I mean the life-long stuff, the things that make you want to get out of bed in the morning, the stuff that gets your heart pumping, your body moving; those things. 

I’m not talking about getting up and getting to work, paying the bills, or making sure you get the laundry done.  The day-to-day minutia of life is important on a small scale, but there should and Must be a deeper meaning in your life (your Mission) to make it all worth it.  Now it might come as no shock that a lot of people don’t have a mission, or what some might call Passion.  They drift through life without any foundational drive or motivation.  Is that you?  I must admit, there have been times where I felt completely directionless, lost even.  There have been times where I could see the path before me clear as day, and hated the direction it was leading me in.  See, it’s not so much enough to have a passion and direction, but you must be willing and wanting to go down that road as well.

How do you decide?  Well, it has to be important to you; the whole thing, not just the end goal.  To have meaning and value, the process of getting from your dream to your reality must be endurable and enjoyable, at least on some level.  I’ve spent many a moment pondering what was important and what wasn’t.  At the very foundation, I know it’s important to at least attempt to live up to my potential.  Sometimes that can be hard, especially if at some point you realize you were reaching.  Mistakes are worth it most of the time. But Only if you learn from them. When you do, you’ll start to realize what is really important!

Hang on a Second!

Dost thou love life, then do not squander time,
for that's the stuff life is made of.
Benjamin Franklin

Have you ever just felt like no matter how busy or pressed for time you are, you need to just take a second out and stop?  The world careens around us, seemingly out of our control or influence, which it is, but your life lies in your control.  You should take that control and use it to your fullest.  Don’t worry, the world will always command your time, demand your attention, and be a force you cannot deny or ignore. So if that’s true, why give it your undivided attention, 24/7?  The simple answer is you don’t have to.  Taking a few moments out and diverting your attention to something that Really, Truly matters is not a crime and you shouldn’t feel guilty about it.

Today is a great example of this.  I was dropping my little one off at school.  She has been having a bit of trouble the last two weeks getting it in gear in the morning despite my prodding.  We were a bit late but I just had to stop and give her my total attention, look her in the eye and ask what was wrong.  We both needed that.  Now we agreed to talk about it more later, but that moment of shutting the world out was important.   Not only does it show my daughter she is important, it shows I know how to prioritize and give attention to what I value.

Sometimes recognizing what we really should be giving our attention to can be difficult.  There are clues and warnings, signs and symptoms, but if we don't take a moment out every so often, you'll totally miss those signs.  It might take a conscious effort at first to make yourself pause fo a moment and just look at what's going on around you.  You know there's an old saying, "if you don't look up once in a while, the world will pass you by".  It's true, what's even worse is the things you care most about will also pass you by.  And the people and things we truly care about make life worth living in the first place.  Don't let them slide through your life unnoticed!

MyEccentricTees.com