Happy New Year

By Douglas Clark
-Head Writer - The Inspiration Engine


There's so much to be thankful for, even if you don't realize it. Set a goal for 2016 and do your best to meet it. For me, my goal is to get as much writing done as I can. Also, my other goal is to get something published.


Make a plan, stick to it and you should hit your mark. Believe in yourself and you can accomplish what you set out to do.


Good luck.

2016

Thanks for reading.

Where Am I Going?

Douglas Clark
-Head writer, The Inspiration Engine

Have you ever been working on something so long you kind of lose sight of the point of it all? It’s kind of like wondering if everything you’ve done is really leading you somewhere or perhaps every choice you’ve ever made is just some random ping pong like course you’re chaotically leading through life.

I’m going to be completely honest with you. I have six months to go before I’m 40. For a long time it didn’t make any difference to me. Most of the time, age is just a number. But the more I thought about it, and the closer it approached, I realized 40 is more than my age. On May 15^th, it will mark the fact that so far, I’ve had 40 years to accomplish everything I’ve ever dreamed of.

Now that’s not to say I was on a deadline and not finishing by my 40^th birthday means I failed. Actually, it reminds me of all the time I’ve wasted. You see, I like to be busy, the more I have to do, the better I can do everything (up until I burn out that is). When I’ve got all the time in the world and I don’t have to rush or worry, or even really care what the clock says, I kind of just procrastinate. 

Remember that old cliché, “If you want something done, give it to a busy person.”? Well that is me, at least where work is concerned. When it comes to my personal goals, well, I kind of slack off. You know the feeling right?

Granted, I’ve written two novels, a host of short stories and poems, and two plus years of blog posts. But in my head, I remember all the times I didn’t write, all the times I didn’t capitalize on the few minutes here and the few minutes there I could have written just a little more. Also, I think of where I’ve been, the places I’ve visited, how far I’ve advanced (or not advanced depending on your perspective) and sometimes I wonder if I’ve shortchanged myself.

Even when I failed miserably, couldn’t achieve the goal I set, got tired, etc., I usually feel like I could have done better, or if I tried again with a different approach, I could do better. I don’t think I’m a perfectionist, but I am persistent. Putting all this together, though, I still wonder, where am I going?

To put it another way, the question I’m faced with is this: How efficient have I been with my 40 years of life? Will I do better going forward?

I could have done better; I could have done worse. The reality of it is I am where I am, simple as that. As happy or dissatisfied as I am with my life thus far, I can’t change it. The only thing I can do is try to make the next 40 years, or however much more I have left better, more enjoyable, more fulfilling and fruitful.

The future has no form. It’s my job to mold my present to help make tomorrow more to my liking.

Do you know where you’re going?

Thanks for reading.

Questions and comments welcome.

DouglasHClark.com

What a Disappointing Turn of Events

By Douglas Clark

About a year ago I applied for a job and had an interview that went great. I related very well to my potential new boss and his team, the work seemed interesting and the prospects of advancing appeared good. Everything looked like a good fit. After leaving the interview, I not only expected a job offer, I knew they would extend one. 

What I didn’t anticipate was the lackluster benefits package they would ultimately offer. Now don’t get me wrong, I didn’t expect a silver platter full of gold. What I got, however, amounted to only about one thousand dollars more than I made at the time, only at the new position I would be doing twice the work. Also, the healthcare and retirement package was almost nonexistent. 

Needless to say, I felt a bit perplexed. It’s a major thing to uproot yourself from a long standing position. One needs at least a bit of enticement to make such a switch. Obviously, I didn’t take the job. It led me to realize though, there’s nothing more deflating and de-motivational than getting socked with the knowledge that all your efforts resulted in something less than favorable or desired.

So how do you handle disappointment? It doesn’t have to be a job offer. It can be a sporting event, a diet goal, a physical challenge, pretty much anything. If you put effort, time, money, and devotion into something and the result falls woefully short of your expectations, what do you do? For me, I just kept trying to find a new position that fit my expectations, skill set, and professional needs. I just kept trying.

Now it’s kind of hard to just keep at something if you continually fail. So in that regard it’s necessary to reexamine your goals, your approach and your reasoning for pursuing that dream in the first place. This is where it gets unpleasant. You see, you might find that the dream and goal you work so hard for will never come to fruition. Certain obstacles might just be too big. That’s a hard pill to swallow. And believe me, I’ve given up on a few things in my life, like being six foot tall, running a mile in less than eight minutes, playing basketball, for example. Now everyone has limitation and difficulties, but the hard part is realizing they might be getting in the way of you achieving that goal you set out for yourself. That hurts.

However, we all have skills and abilities that set us apart from others. Many of these skills and abilities may lay dormant simply because you don’t explore them. Clearing away old and tired, unsuccessful habits can open up possibilities never imagined beforehand.  If you reexamine your goals and approach you might realize something else can take your old pursuit’s place and still provide a meaningful return. 

There will always be sorrow and lingering doubt when/if you stop pursuing a dream. Thoughts like, “If I just gave it a bit more time, I might have made it”, or some such. If you turn that around and say something more positive like, “I’m free to pursue something new and exciting with a real possibility of success now”, you might just find new motivation and energy that you thought you lost, or didn’t know you possessed in the first place.

Remember, every end can be a new beginning.

Thanks for reading.

Questions and comments are welcome.

DouglasHClark.com

Think Big

by Douglas Clark

Have you ever heard anyone say “I want to get second place”, “I’m working toward being mediocre”, or “My dream is to be average”? Probably not in a serious way you haven’t. It reminds me of a Monster.com commercial that’s pretty funny. Nobody consciously decides they want to be just another face in the crowd, not without giving up first. You see the thing is, most people try, experience difficulty, muddle through, and then find a certain amount of equilibrium with their environment, situation and circumstance, but then never really break through and excel beyond the status quo. This is where people become apathetic.

You can’t counteract apathy though. Think of this from a different perspective. I’m sure you’ve heard someone say “Aim High”, heck the Air Force used to use that as a tag line in their TV and radio commercials for years. Or maybe you’ve heard the saying ‘reach for the stars’, or ‘the sky’s the limit’. The common theme here is striving for something just out of reach, pushing yourself to achieve something slightly beyond your abilities or just to experience something new. What’s the point though?

The goal here is Success. Success does take an extraordinary amount of effort though, and it starts with something even more important. Thinking Big. That’s right. Putting your mind and thoughts on the right track, allowing yourself to believe what you dream is possible, and accepting the possibility that you might just be able to make all you want possible is the first step in achieving your dreams. It does not matter how you characterize or quantify success. Reaching your goals, and accomplishing your mission requires being positive. Sometimes I lean toward the negative, pessimistic side of things. When I feel that type of thing seeping into my thought process, I counter it with positive, sometimes grandiose daydreaming and proclamations. They’re designed to refocus my mindset, forcing me to accept the possibility that the great and wonderful things I want to achieve are at least thinkable, let alone possible. That’s why I still believe I’ll be a world famous writer one day.

You’ve got to want it. Thinking that you will be the best, achieve the highest goals, win the most prestigious awards, earn the most money, be the most famous; it all starts with you thinking big. Daring yourself to simply imagine the great possibilities of ‘what if’ is the first step on your journey to greatness. Take that step!

Thanks for reading

Questions and comments are welcome.

DouglasHClark.com

Let's Focus a Bit...

By Douglas Clark

Most people have no idea of the giant capacity we can immediately command when we focus all of our resources on mastering a single area of our lives.

~Tony Robbins

A very big challenge for me has always been focus. True at heart, I am a day dreamer. There have been and are multiple scenarios and situations where I find myself being whisked away to a dreamland conjured up from my imagination. It's just fun to get lost in a world of my own creation. 

From a young age, if I were staring out the window of my parents’ car, watching the rain come down, stuck at the dentist’s office, bored at school, etc., I would always find myself creating fantastical narratives for me and my imaginary characters to explore. Now I never got in trouble in school or work for distractions, but I realized a long time ago that even though daydreaming and imaginations are great fodder for creating art, lack of focus can wash away all relevance those daydreams brought.

You see, focus keeps us in line. Focusing on the job at hand, getting things done, and checking things off the ‘to do’ list help you keep an organized life, but if you don’t find time to daydream, that life becomes pretty sterile. I find that sometimes when I get focused on my day-to-day chores and responsibilities, I lose that head in the clouds type mindset that helps me create.  

It took me a long time to realize balancing my life between focused responsibility and daydreaming is vital. I love to daydream and just imagine, but when I apply my focus and determination to expression– that’s when real creativity begins. For a long time I wanted to write a full novel, but it wasn't until I focused my determination and married it with my creativity did I actually finish one. 

Being good at a few, or even just one thing can bring order and meaning into our lives. I’ve often thought about my education and what type of expertise and authority it brings to my opinion about literature and writing. From my experiences and studies I know I don’t know everything, but I know enough to comment and help others improve. It’s more than I could do in a physics class. I’d be totally lost. But the written and spoken word – well I’ve done pretty good for myself learning how to use them both. 

Now obviously I still have a lot to learn. With such a diverse and growing language as English, there’s always more to know. But language is the one thing I know I’m good at, even if sometimes I need a reminder about how much more I need to know about focus. I’m not myopic in the subject matter in which I’d like to learn more, but I narrowed it down considerably from when I was younger.

Learning who you are and what you like is a long process; you change as you grow up and gain experience. Staying focused on what you want and love helps to bring clarity to your actions and direction. If you suffer from a lack of direction or focus, look at the things that are distracting you. The answer to finding focus might be staring you right in the face. Oh, and no matter how many times you get side tracked and distracted, make sure you come back to focusing on your dreams and goals. Sooner or later, staying focused on your mission will become a habit.

Thanks for reading

Questions and comments welcome.

DouglasHClark.com

Perseverance vs. Obstinacy

The difference between perseverance and obstinacy is that one comes from a strong will, and the other from a strong won't.  

~Henry Ward Beecher

What good is a strong will if you are fighting for or against the wrong thing? I wonder that sometimes. Getting caught up in the mechanics of life, I noticed there are times when simply plowing ahead toward a goal becomes counterproductive. At that point, re-evaluation of the method, tactics, and even the very goal need to take place. All the effort in the world fails to help if the goal you work for holds no merit. So, where perseverance assists in forging ahead through the hard times, obstinacy blinds you to wrong, ineffective, and destructive behaviors that hinder success. 

Coming to this realization is difficult and sometimes painful; it can also be very hard. Admitting that you spend all that time and effort on a goal that proved unattainable is heartbreaking. But think about it this way, would you rather admit a change is needed today and start fresh, or soldier on for another month, year, or decade before that epiphany occurs? In ten years’ time you’ll be no better off, and ten years behind. Making the change now can cause grief, pain, sorrow; any number of negative emotions really. However, you might just realize after re-evaluating your current course that a new path will make things better. You might, dare I say, experience relief, joy, or even excitement at the prospect of trying something new. 

Not every problem or situation needs to be attacked with mindless obstinacy. Obstacles in life should be looked at as challenges to overcome and something to learn from, not barriers to destroy or annoyances to avoid. Life takes a lot of work. It reminds me of a very old saying: 

The man who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones. 

~Confucius

Everything worth the effort takes time; just make sure you are putting your energies in the right place.

Thanks for reading. Questions and comments are welcome. 

Dreams are Hard Work

Did you ever think for a moment that what you really wanted in life might just be too hard to get? Did you ever think it would be easier to just dream about what you want instead of actually doing all the hard work involved in actually earning it? I’ll tell you straight out, yes, I’ve thought those things. I’ve been in love with the dream of being a published, successful writer for so long, sometimes I find myself indulging in the fantasy of writing, rather than actually DOING it. I’d imagine elaborate scenarios where I’m accepting an award for an amazing piece of literature I created, or signing a multi-million dollar book deal. I’ve got a good imagination so you can assume the fantasy was pretty impressive. Now I’ve also sat and contemplated all the things involved in making those fantasies a reality. You know what it comes down to? A shit ton of hard work. That’s right. Making a dream a reality requires determination, persistence, perseverance and a lot of backbreaking, mind bendingly hard work. So, can you do it? Do you have what it takes to make your far flung dreams something real?

My answer to that question is YES. It has to be otherwise I’ve just been lying to myself all these years. I know my abilities are good enough to accomplish my goals. It’s a funny thing about dreams, though. They can help you through some really tough times but if you let them take over, or just fester, they can become an oppressive thing that weights you down instead of lifting you up. Sometimes the thing that stands in the way of your dream isn’t under your control at all. The relationship you have with your dreams can be a complex one. I think Langston Hughes’ poem, A Dream Deferred sums it up best.

What happens to a dream deferred?

Does it dry up

Like a raisin in the sun?

Or fester like a sore--

And then run?

Does it stink like rotten meat?

Or crust and sugar over--

like a syrupy sweet?

Maybe it just sags

like a heavy load.

Or does it explode?

There are so many courses your life can take; correspondingly, your dreams can shift as well. The main point is if you don’t do anything to make those dreams a reality, they become a negative. You will become disheartened and cynical. Part of the reason achieving your dreams feels so good is because of the hard work involved. Knowing that your effort is what made that dream come true is a reward unto itself, above and beyond the dream. Realizing a dream can be fantastic, but along the way you’ll develop self-reliance and perseverance. Those are qualities that can make almost any dream a reality. So instead of day dreaming (like I used to do) get out there and do the hard work necessary to make that dream come true.

I challenge you. Recognize your one true dream. Visualize it and know that it is what you want. List all the steps needed to bring that dream into reality. Then, do it. Do it today! And tell me, what's your step one?

Thanks for reading. Questions and comments are welcome. 

Taking a Break

Long ago, on a TV schedule many of you may or may not remember there was a show called Cheers. Remember it? Well they had a theme song and it started out: “Makin' your way in the world today takes everything you've got - Taking a break from all your worries sure would help a lot - Wouldn't you like to get away?” 

Some of the allure to that show was the idea that other people knew who you were, and knew your name. They had your problems, other people knew how you felt and could relate to your feelings. It also offered a break from the daily grind; a place where you could relax, blow off some steam and just have fun. Being able step away from your worries for a little while is a great idea. Do you ever do it though? Think about it. We all have goals and aspirations; we all work and pay bills; we all are striving for something, but how often do you just set it all aside and relax? I’m guessing if you’re like me, you don’t relax anywhere as much as you should and even when you try, you’re still a bit tense about things.

Don’t worry, you’re not crazy. We live in an overcharged, hyper-active society. It’s hard to disconnect from our technologically dependent lifestyle. If you think about it, getting away from the electronic distractions is almost impossible. For me, I would have to get rid of my TV, my computer, my laptop, my iPhone, my radio, and my car just to eliminate the immediate distractions I have right at my fingertips. Granted I’m not going to do that, but those devices do offer a somewhat false escape from the world. The TV and internet offer entertainment but you will invariably be bombarded with commercials demanding you buy the next great thing, even though you don’t need it, same with the radio. Heck, phones nowadays are TVs, radios, and computers all rolled into one. Makes you wonder why we have any of the other things in the first place. Point is, getting away from distractions is hard, but if you try you might just find something interesting. Instead of being bombarded with commercials demanding you money, why don’t you try something completely different – A real break from the norm.

Recently I went to a dance; a waltz and polka. Now that isn’t something I try on a regular basis but I was keen to tackle something new, just for the experience. It genuinely was a break from the norm. Okay, so nobody there knew my name but I didn’t care. In fact, the entire dance was a period piece focusing on the 1800s. You wouldn’t find a TV or cell phone anywhere back then. The thing is, even if you are totally focused on your mission in life and wanting to achieve things, you really need to take a moment to look around and enjoy the moment you are in. Ever hear that old saying “stop and smell the roses”? Well it’s actually a good idea from time to time to actually take a break. At the very least you can catch your breath for the next round of insanity we call modern life.

Thanks for reading. Questions and comments are welcome. 

Attack of the Resolutionists

Every year I hope it doesn’t come. Every year I hope against hope that the inevitable will somehow be avoided and peace will reign. I cross my fingers, watch the New Year’s Eve ball drop and pray that the Resolutionists won’t come, I pray that this year will be the year we are spared their terrible onslaught, but they always come. Once that clock strikes midnight, millions of Americans are infected with the Resolution virus and spawn a mass army of New Year joy fueled “This year I’m going to…” mania. They amass as a unified force to invade the common person’s stomping grounds and take over. 

You’ll notice them immediately. Once normal coworkers or friends will be reading some new book, touting some new diet, packing a strange lunch they must concoct in the break room; they’ll begin telling you all about the virtues and minutia of gym workouts and how amazing it is getting up an hour early to go for a three mile run. You may notice a group of them flocked together to go for a mid day lunch walk while you’re at work. They huddle together while they dominate the sidewalk but charge ahead like brain starving zombies on a quest to find fresh meat. The produce section of supermarkets will appear to have been ransacked leaving nothing but a few bruised gala apples, some smashed grapes and of course the eggplant (does anyone know how to cook them properly). Oddly enough the broccoli is usually the first to be devoured, and if you ask me that’s just fine. Resolutionists deserve that bit of torture ;-)

One place you’ll be able to spot a Resolutionist is at the gym. One of the most frequent accompanying phrases to the “This year I’m going to…” battle cry is “go to the gym more often,” much to my chagrin. See I’ve been a devout weight trainer for years. I do in fact stick with it. So you can imagine my frustration in January and February (sometimes into March for the truly fanatical Resolutionist) when the floor of the gym is inundated with newly christened health nuts bent on questing for a perfect Greek body, but lacking any common sense or any basic knowledge of body building techniques, or basic gym etiquette for that matter. I’ve found it humorous and infuriating all at the same time watching these people struggle at something they’ve ill-prepared themselves for. 

Trust me, at 12:01 am, January 1^st, on whatever year it may be saying “This year I’m going to go to the gym more often,” is nowhere near enough prep time to truly set yourself up for success. Off handed motivational decrees usually wind up on the mental rubbish heap specifically because they were rash, off the cuff quips. Yes they may have meant it when they said it, but Resolutionists lack proper motivation, resolve, and persistence. Therein lies their greatest weakness; like the may fly, the Resolutionist has a very short shelf life. By late winter, early spring their mass army has been decimated by pizza, tacos, TV, the couch, and lethargy. Temptation is their mortal enemy, and it destroys every Resolutionist army every year without fail. For the Resolutionist, as initially motivated as they are, simply cannot win. They are destined to lose because in their minds the first failure is their ultimate defeat. They fail, pack it in, and call it a year.

In response to this horrible onslaught we suffer every year, I call on you to rise up, not as a Resolutionist, but as a Healthinista! Devote yourself to overall health, mind, body, soul, perspective. Base your actions on overall life goals, mapped out for the improvement of all aspects of your life, not just some whimsical “This year I’m going to…”decree. Start slow, start right, get informed, and keep at it even if you fail. In fact if you fall off the wagon get right back up. Revel in your own persistence to keep trying even though the first or even tenth time you’re still trying to get it right. Motivate yourself through your failures to try again, Each time. Rise up, take charge of your life and help defeat the mediocre armies of the Resolutionists!

Thanks for reading. Questions and comments are always welcome. 

Fortitude is in the Mind

Stay strong in body and mind

Have you ever been accused of being stubborn?  Are you stubborn?  Being single minded about an objective or goal is actually a very good thing.  It keeps you focused.  I call it fortitude.  Applying your personal strength and conviction to a single goal helps achievement, but what about applying fortitude to life in general.  What good is that and what purpose does that serve? Well, having the strength of mind to withstand the pains and adversity of life is a pretty valuable asset don’t you think?  I’ve talked about perseverance and how it aids you on your life’s mission and keeps you going toward your goals.  But perseverance isn’t enough.  That’s right, you need fortitude.  Being able to keep going is one thing, being able to maintain your mindset and inner strength as well is totally different.  There will be a time when challenges in your life beat you down so much you might think you’ve lost.  But if you have a solid foundation of who you are, what your values are, and why you have them, well that’s fortitude, and you can take comfort from that; draw strength from that and carry on.

Why bother?

The only person that will always be with you throughout your life is you.  You better like that person’s company if you’re going to find any value in your life.  I know a person who has compromised everything they ever held dear because they thought it would be easier to attain what they wanted.  That person was wrong.  I know another person that never bothered to set any life goals, look toward the future or bother to develop a strong sense of self worth or conviction.  That person’s life is very unhappy. 

I’ve had my values tested, my convictions called into question, but I’ve always focused on who I was, what I wanted and what I valued.  When I weighed the options and saw what compromising my ideals would bring, I chose the right path.  Fortitude isn’t just about being strong.  It’s about believing in yourself when things go wrong, look terrible and you doubt everything.  When I got divorced, everything seemed go to wrong, then get really bad, and then get horrible.  I was hungry, homeless, penniless and thousands of miles away from family.  Let me tell you, sleeping out on the street for a few days really tests your fortitude.  I made mistakes, chose poorly, and didn’t listen to common sense.  I paid the price.  But because I took the time to re-examine my path, but stay strong to my convictions, I steered back toward my goal, and continued on my mission. 

Getting through the bad times can be done.  I know it from experience.  Don’t give up.  Stay strong.  You never know when things will turn around. 

Thanks for reading, post a question or comment.  I’d love to hear from you.

Check out this picture and others here.

Most of us regard good luck as our right, and bad luck as a betrayal of that right.

- William Feather (read about him here)

Disappointment can be a hard thing to deal with, especially if you’ve worked really hard at something.  Putting forth real effort to reach your goal, to drive toward your mission is always a great achievement, but there’s something so deflating when you don’t reach your goal due to no fault of your own.  Sometimes, things or people get in your way and you fail, not because you didn’t try, but because your efforts were thwarted by circumstances, or by other people.  Unfortunately, you may encounter people in your life who actually try to sabotage your endeavors.  Sometimes they do this because they are ignorant of your aims and inadvertently get in the way.  Sometimes, they are deliberately vindictive or jealous, and actively attempt to ruin your work.  Yes, there is that type of ugliness in the world and I’m sure you have experienced it.  I myself have been the target of nefarious individuals at one time or another in my life.  And let me tell you it is not pleasant. 

It would be one thing to fail because you gave up, or because you simply weren’t good enough, but when another individual deliberately stands in your way and tries to make you fail, it’s a despicable thing.  So how do you handle that?  What do you do?  It would be a cope out to say ‘just live with it’ and it would also be dismissive to say ‘just think positively.’  Those cliché type pieces of advice don’t really help at all.  If you really do have someone that is deliberately trying to sabotage your goals, the best thing to do is eliminate them from your life.  Cut them out completely and do not let them back in.  I knew someone that took every opportunity to try and degrade me, insult me, slander my name and deliberately lie about me to try and influence people to dislike me.  I know the quality of my character and anyone worth knowing would take the time to get to know me as a person, not just the lies of a malcontent trying to break someone down instead of building themselves up.  As soon as I cut off all contact with that person and redirected my life on a new course, guess what!  My life became so much more enjoyable, meaningful, and most of all, positive. 

You DO NOT have to allow negative, self-interested and destructive people into your life.  If you have found someone like that has crept in, evict them.  You are the one that has to live your life and the world will make it difficult just by its nature.  Don’t assist the forces of despair and negativity.  Situate yourself so positive, uplifting people can assist you in your goals, and help drive you toward your mission.  That way, when disappointment does strike, it will have much less power than it would otherwise.  Positivity is great, but structuring your life to accentuate the positiveness of the people around you is even better.  Go ahead, set yourself up for success!

Perseverance Pays Off

What keeps you going?  How do you go on when you know it may never get any better than this? 

Hope.  As corny as that sounds, it’s true.  It’s very rare that you find a person who’s life is absolutely nothing but despair, or total happiness.  Life has a way of fluctuating and changing without you even lifting a finger to help it.  But if you don’t even try to direct it on a course that you can live with, it will become oppressive.  That attempt at driving your life forward can be hard, but it can also be rewarding. 

Those clichés about ‘giving it your all’ or ‘never giving up’ and the like are clichés because people have used those thoughts and ideas to persist, strive, endure.  The mere act of living through hard times is an act of perseverance.  Now, I’m not talking about continuing on a path you know will lead to failure.  I’m not suggesting that you take on an endeavor you know to be fool-hearty and just shlog through hoping it will all work out in the end.  No, what I’m talking about is staying focused on your dreams, accepting your limitations, learning to deal with them and exploring new ways to achieve your goals. 

Remember, life can and does change if you change the way you look at it.  Striving for the ideal is motivational, comparing your success to the past is logical, and driving yourself to not give in to despair will help in your longevity.  Perseverance isn’t just about not giving up, it’s about doing better with what you have, even if what you have is less than yesterday.  Tomorrow can be better, you just have to give it your all.

  

You gotta believe you’re awesome to Be awesome.